A Reddit user has been voted "not the a**hole" "for telling a colleague their disability is not a free pass to be an a****** and getting them suspended."
User niffedofficeworker describes themselves as a 29-year-old male who has recently started "a new position at the beginning of November with a decent sized law firm in my city." They explain that despite enjoying their job, they began hearing "horror stories around a member of the office we will call 'J.' I've heard that the last two people that took this position were basically bullied out of the post by J and that anybody who makes any complaints to HR basically get told to put up and shut up for two reasons."
A study from March 2022 conducted by Quality Logo Products found that 90 percent of American employees report having a co-worker that annoys them. Fifty-seven percent of workers say they have considered quitting their job because of a co-worker, and 55 percent report that even while working remotely, co-workers are still annoying them.
The Reddit user explained: "Firstly J, despite not being the most popular person in the office, is very good at what she does to the point the company sees her as invaluable and secondly, J is a wheelchair user and is apparently very quick to throw the discrimination card around as soon as something doesn't go her way. Another key point to this tale is that I use a stoma bag and have done since I was a baby."
They go on to describe their first interaction with J when they used the disabled bathroom to empty their stoma bag.
They wrote: "I started hearing a loud banging on the door. I said one moment and opened the door to a lady in a wheelchair, the infamous J. I was berated for about five minutes things such as 'why is a healthy young man using a disabled bathroom I should be ashamed, etc' drawing the attention of everyone in the nearby vicinity before she even let me speak. I eventually got a word in, reminded her that not all disabilities are blatantly obvious and lifted my shirt up to show her my bag. She went bright red and I got on with my day."
The next day, the user reported that there was a sign on the bathroom saying "wheelchair users only." After commenting to another member of staff, "have you seen J's latest stunt," they then received an email from HR and a verbal warning.
The Reddit user then describes how they lost their cool with J and told her "that the only reason she is still in a job is because of how long she had been with the business and that she isn't going to bully me out of my position like she had my two predecessors."
J was then suspended, according to the user, for "gross misconduct" and their verbal warning was "expunged."
"Whilst nobody is openly celebrating J's departure as would be a bit classless there certainly seems to be a better atmosphere around the office so I guess that's a positive," the user said.
Newsweek spoke to Jared Pope, a HR law specialist and founder of Work Shield, about the controversial post, he said: "Situations like these, including any Title VII incident (a section of the Civil Rights Act which bans employment discrimination on the basis of race, color, national origin, sex including pregnancy, and religion) that occurs in the workplace, can be sticky-drama situations that have to be handled with care, expertise and, most importantly, ensuring everyone has a voice to be truly heard.
"Without understanding the proverbial 'other side of the coin,' one thing can be stated clearly: incidents related to discrimination and harassment, as well as any workplace misconduct, is best handled by a third-party to ensure the removal of any bias, whether conscious or not, as well as maintaining an objective and concrete framework in which these investigations are handled. To handle otherwise allows for processes to be overlooked, skipped, side tracked or disregarded which in turn allows voices to not be truly heard and decisions to be made on limited understanding."
On Reddit, other users supported the original poster.
User melkesjokolade89 said: "Ambulatory wheelchair user here and 100 percent agree. I also have invisible disabilities and had to use the accessible toilet before I got my wheelchair. Never assume all disability is visible, most isn't."
User Blurgas wrote: "You'd think someone who works at a law firm, disabled or not, would know better than to screw with ADA compliance."
User IntoTheSinBinForYou commented: "NTA Not all heroes wear capes. My disabilities are not external and someone like J would never be able to understand."
Newsweek has reached out to user niffedofficeworker for comment.
Have you had a similar workplace dilemma? Let us know via life@newsweek.com. We can ask experts for advice, and your story could be featured on Newsweek.
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