Murdered Detective Garda Adrian Donohoe's colleague said he feels "guilty" he survived while the family man was killed.
ormer Garda Detective Joe Ryan was held at gunpoint on the night Det Donohoe was murdered outside Lordship Credit Union in January 2013.
He also labelled those who carried out the robbery which resulted in the officer’s death as “cowards”.
Mr Ryan was forced to retire from the Force after suffering post traumatic stress disorder.
He told RTÉ Prime Time tonight: “Amy and Niall were robbed of a loving father, Caroline was robbed of a loving husband, Dundalk Station party of a valued colleague and all because of one stupid act, one stupid cowardly act.”
Mr Ryan, who lives in Spain now, said: “Adrian lived for his family and work.
“I feel guilty, that’s what I feel, guilty in the sense that… Adrian is dead and I’m not.
“Adrian was a family man, I don’t have any kids. It’s guilt I mainly feel.
“I went back to work… then the night Tony Golden got murdered I was put off sick and had to retire due to PTSD.
“There’s people out there with information, I know who they are, they know who they are.
“They are absolute cowards, no one should be protecting them.”
The former garda told of the terror he felt when a shotgun and handgun were pointed at his head and body, as he sat in a garda car, that night.
Det Donohoe had just got out of the car when Mr Ryan heard a noise and realised they were in trouble.
“The first thing I heard was banging off to my right hand side and shouting,” Mr Ryan said.
“And then two people running towards the garda car. Then the shotgun (was) discharged over the roof of the car, which hit Adrian and killed him outright.”
Mr Ryan said he didn’t realise his colleague had been killed. And almost immediately, two armed accomplices pointed their weapons at him.
“The (car) door was opened and the same shotgun and a handgun similar to what we were carrying, 9 mil, was pointed at me and I was threatened,” he said.
The former guard recalled how the gunmen were shouting: ‘Give us the keys, give us the money, I’m going to f…ing kill you’.
“It felt like ten minutes, but as we know from recordings, it was 58 seconds, 59 seconds, but, to me it felt like ten minutes,” he added.
“When you’re aware of a firearm that has been discharged is pointing at your head and your general torso it is a frightening experience.
“What was going through my mind at the time was ‘I hope I get shot by the 9 mil’ because if it was the shotgun, it would have been fatal. You’ve some chance to survive a 9 mil.”
He told how the gunmen took the car keys and fled in a stolen Volkswagen Passat.
It was only then when he realised Det Donohoe was dead.
“When I got out of the vehicle I drew my own weapon,” Mr Ryan recalled.
“I assumed a shooting position but due to the laws we operate under, I was unable to fire because the imminent threat to anybody had dissipated.
“So then I went around to the front of the car to see if Adrian was ok and I saw him lying on the ground, went to him, and attempted first aid.
“But his injuries were so horrific, it was plain he was dead, and nothing could be done for him.”
Mr Ryan was able to tell the first responders to the murder scene the gang members who threatened him had local accents.
That information helped spark an investigation that resulted in the prosecution of Aaron Brady, 29, from Crossmaglen, Co Armagh, on Wednesday.
Brady was handed a life sentence, with a minimum tariff of 40 years, for the capital murder of Det Donohoe.
Mr Ryan provided a victim impact statement to the Central Criminal Court in Dublin, which laid bare the damage the “pointless” murder has had on his life to this day.
PTSD forced his early retirement 10 years early from An Garda Síochána.
This was a particularly difficult decision, given Mr Ryan had long aspired to serve as a garda.
The Co Cork native had attended The Garda College in Templemore, Co Tipperary, in 1991.
He graduated a year later and was stationed in Dromad, Co Louth. That was to be the start of a decade policing the border.
Within just a few years he was moved to Dundalk and excelled becoming a detective.
And in 1994, he met Det Donohoe, when the Co Cavan garda arrived as a new recruit to Dundalk.
“Adrian was a gentle giant, a family man, very community spirited, a great guard,” he said.
Mr Ryan lives with the trauma of that night and the loss of another colleague, Tony Golden, murdered two years later.
Though he left the Force, he lives with hope the investigation to bring the other gang members to justice, will herald results.
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Colleague of Adrian Donohoe feels 'guilty' he survived the night Donohoe was killed - Independent.ie
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